


The Storm Before the Calm

by WonderingScientist



Category: Hourou Musuko | Wandering Son
Genre: Canon Trans Character, F/F, Gender Dysphoria, Mostly Canon Compliant, Trans Female Character, Transition, although Chii Anna and Nitori all go to the same uni, gender neutral pronouns for Chii, post events of the manga
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2020-03-26 05:54:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19000048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WonderingScientist/pseuds/WonderingScientist
Summary: When it all reaches breaking point, Nitori decides she can't wait any longer and starts her transition.





	1. Breaking Point

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea rattling around my head for a while now, and this fandom need more content so I thought I'd finally start writing this in earnest and posting it here. Hope you all enjoy

Nitori Shuuichi opened the door and stormed silently into her dorm room. The room was blissfully dark, and her roommates were thankfully absent. She made her way to the bathroom, eager to get her evening routine over and done with. She entered the room but left the light off, using the darkness as a shield. It had been a long horrid day, like most, but today it was worse and her body ached painfully.

            She closed her eyes and removed her clothes, then navigating on memory alone, she went about the process of showering blind, reaching for where she knew the body wash was, where the shampoo was. As she did she desperately held back the breakdown that was building inside her. Her dorm mates would be home soon and the last thing she needed was for them to find her on the bottom of the shower bawling.

            Once she had finished washing Nitori stepped out from the shower, although she didn’t open her eyes until her body was once more hidden by clothes. Once she did she noticed the change in the light quality in the room. The main room’s light was on. Nitori steeled herself. She hated her room mates, more so because she was stuck with them more than out of any sort of dislike of their character. Opening the door she stepped into the main room,  blinking as her eyes adjusted to the bright light.

            ‘Hoi, Shuu.’ The speaker was Yuukihiro, a slender boy with eternally messy black hair, ‘we didn’t see you in the mess hall.’ Nitori flinched at the contraction of her name.

            ‘I wasn’t hungry,’ Nitori said, an unintended sharpness creeping into her voice, ‘and I’ve told you not to call me Shuu.’

            ‘Not hungry? How?’ Ryuhei, the other roommate chimed in, ‘and why not, we’re all friends here.’

            ‘We’re not friends,’ Nitori clenched her jaw, she hated their informal friendliness.

            ‘What do you mean?’ Yuukihiro said, indignation creeping into his voice, ‘we’ve been roommates for months.’

            Nitori turned on her heels and left the room. The storm inside her was about to break and she didn’t need her roommates to be around when it did. They’d mock her she knew, ‘what kind of a boy breaks down and cries’ she knew they’d say.

            Nitori made her way across campus, to the girl’s dorm and through the hazy numbness in her brain she managed to find the right door.

            ‘Anna!’ Nitori called at the door as she thumped loudly on it with her fist. ‘Anna please be in’

            The door to the dorm swung open, but to Nitori’s surprise it wasn’t her girlfriend that answered.

            ‘Nitorin?’ Chii said, surprised to find her friend at her doorstep.

            ‘Chii?’ Nitori realised she should have know her girlfriend wouldn’t be the only one in her dorm room. She was just glad Anna was sharing a room with Chii.

            ‘Chii, is Anna in?’ Nitori asked, trying to keep the desperation out of her voice

            ‘She’s at a modelling thing.’ Chii explained, then looked Nitori again before adding, ‘Do you want to come in anyway?’

            Nitori nodded and stepped inside She only made it a few steps inside before the storm brewing inside her broke out and she collapsed to the floor, tears spilling down her cheeks.

            Chii sat down next to Nitori on the floor, unsurprised by the break down. They had read it all over Nitori when she had answered the door.

            ‘It’s going be ok Nitorin,’ Chii said in a soothing voice, ‘do you want to talk about it?’

 

            Nitori shook her head, unable to talk over the tears.

            ‘Anna’s not going to be back for another hour or two, but you can stay here until she returns if you would like,’ Chii said, ‘that’s why you came here after all.’

            Nitori nodded slowly, still unable to speak.

 

******************************************************************************

 

Anna Suehiro opened the door to her dorm room and stepped inside taking off her winter coat and hanging it on the hook on the back of the door.

            ‘Why did I hear a rumour from the girls downstairs that you let a boy into out dorm room, Chii?’ Anna asked, turning around and tossing her handbag onto her bed.

            ‘Because most people don’t know Nitorin is a girl.’ Chii said, in a matter of fact way

            Anna turned around to find Nitori sitting on Chii’s bed, Chii sitting beside her. Nitori’s eyes where puffy and red from crying and her usually neat hair was a mess.

            ‘Oh Nitorin, sweetheart,’ Anna exclaimed in surprise, moving to crouch in front of Nitori, ‘are you ok?’

            Nitori shook her head and Anna realised how silly that question was. Of course Nitori wasn’t, she was here in Anna’s dorm and had obviously been crying.

            ‘What’s happened?’ Anna asked with concern in her voice.

            ‘I don’t think I can do this anymore,’ Nitori said softly, looking down at her hands, ‘I know when we talked about it last we both agreed that waiting until after university was sensible, but I don’t think I can…. keep it together for that much longer.’

            Anna wasn’t too surprised by the revelation, she had talked to Nitori about her transition before and knew her dysphoria could get intense. But that wasn’t either of their worries when they talked about it last, they were more worried about her safety.

            ‘Have you talked to your dorm mates?’ Anna asked, slightly surprised, ‘are they going to be ok with it?’

            ‘No, not at all’ Nitori said finally looking up at Anna, and there was hollow defeat in her eyes, ‘They definitely wouldn’t understand and I can’t really transition in the men’s dorm, that’s part of the problem.’

            Anna sat next to Nitori and put her arm around her, leaning her head on Nitori.

            ‘You know, there’s technically space for another person in our dorm room.’ Anna said, ‘I could talk to university administration and see if you can move in here with us.’

            ‘Really?’ Nitori said in surprise, her face visibly brightening.

            ‘Of course,’ Anna replied, ‘I already had a little bit of oversight on who I roomed with so that I didn’t get stuck with a stalkery fan girl, so I can see if university administration can move you in here with us’

            Nitori looked as if  weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

            ‘The only issue is I’m not really sure where to begin,’ Nitori said, her face falling again.

            ‘I know who can help with that.’ Chii said and when Nitori looked up at them questioningly they added, ‘I know you haven’t talked to Ariga in a few months but you may want to reach out to her.’

            Nitori tilted her head quizzically.

            ‘Ariga didn’t want to tell you until you were back home for new year because she wanted to tell you in person but she started her transition a couple of months ago.’ Chii explained ‘She might be able to help you with finding a trans friendly clinic.’

            ‘So I’ll talk to Ariga and you’ll talk to the school admin.’ Nitori said, relief evident in her voice.

            ‘Yup,’ Anna said. Nitori looked up at the ceiling.

            ‘It feels better having a plan at least’ Nitori said, smiling slightly.


	2. Conversations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. I had planned this to be out sooner but I've both been recovering from an operation and struggling a little with writers block. I do fully intend to finish this fic, at some point but the next chapter may be a while as I have con-crunch to deal with and then university is going to start up shortly after. I'll be writing in my spare time at uni so there will be chapters, I just can't really guarantee when.
> 
> also warning for misgendering in the second section

      Nitori fidgeted with the charm on her phone strap as she watched the scenery zip past the window of the shinkansen. She was excited to be seeing Ariga again but at the same time a small pocket of anxiety sat in her stomach as she thought of what was to come.

      She’d have to tell her parents fairly early on, there was no avoiding it. Sure when they talked just before she left to university both her parents had seemed largely ok with the whole thing, there was a difference between them accepting her while she kept everything under wraps and them accepting her transition.

      Queerness was acceptable to many so long as you didn’t ‘indulge yourself in those behaviours’ and when you did do something like finding a partner or transition it was ‘selfish’ and ‘detrimental to the family unit’ and a lot of people got a lot less ok with it. Her parents were probably a lot more ok with thinking that they had a son that cross dressed in his private time than dealing with the fact that Nitori was soon going to be visibly their daughter that they didn’t used to have that was dating another girl.

      Nitori pushed those thoughts out of her head. She didn’t have to cross that bridge just yet. She had thankfully dodged the bullet of explaining to her parents why she was suddenly back in town in the middle of the university semester by staying at Kanako’s place.

      Nitori turned her thoughts to her upcoming meeting with Ariga. She was excited to see her friend again as it had been almost eight months since she had seen Ariga. The two of them had talked throughout the semesters sure but Nitori hadn’t actually seen her in person since she left to university. Plus she was excited to for her friends transition.  
Nitori stared back out the window again, this time with a smile on her face. She fidgeted with her phone charm as the excitement welled up inside her.

  
******************************************************************************

      Anna paused in front of the door for a second, swallowing a lump of anxiety. The name of the door plate read Saito Kenta, Senior Administrator. After a second or two of anxious waiting Chii reached from behind from Anna and knocked on the door.

      After a few seconds a gruff voice called out ‘come in.’

      Anna looked back at Chii and they smiled supportively and gave her a nod. Anna reached forward and opened the door and the two of them entered the room.

      Saito sat hunched at an old looking computer on a plain wood desk surrounded by filling cabinets. He looked up as the Anna and Chii entered the room and the two of them bowed to him. He nodded at them and gestured to the chairs facing him and his desk.

      ‘please, sit’ he said.

      Anna and Chii took a seat each and Saito looked between the two of them

      ‘So what can I do for you ladies’ he asked

       ‘well sir, we’ve come to talk to you about the potential of having another student moving into our dorm room with us…’ Anna began but trailed off trying to pull her thoughts together and find a way of phrasing the next part of the request.

      ‘Ah yes Miss Suehiro, I have been informed of your room arrangements,’ Saito said and turned back to the computer, ‘what is the individuals name so I can arrange the room transfer?’

      Anna swallowed anxiously has the conversation started to deviate from her mental plan ‘Nitori Shuuichi, sir’

      Saito did some quick typing and then frowned at his computer. ‘It says on our records that Nitori Shuuichi is a boy,’ Saito said and looked sternly at Anna, ‘Miss Suehiro am I to understand that you’re requesting a boy move into the girl’s dorm, because that it unacceptable.’

      ‘Not exactly Sir,’ Anna started and she could feel her hands shaking, this wasn’t going to plan, ‘you see..’

      ‘Nitorin is transgender.’ Chii saw Anna was flustered and took the reins. ‘She is listed under the school records as a man but she is in fact a girl.’

      Chii looked to Anna and she smiled and gestured for Chii to continue while she collected herself.

     ‘Nitorin is looking to begin her transition,’ Chii continued, ‘And we all agreed that it was unsafe to do so in the men’s dorms’

      ‘I know it’s highly unusual and it normally wouldn’t be done,’ Anna said, ‘but Chii and I are friends with her and we would have no issue sharing a dorm room with her.’  
Saito looked between the two of them. Anna fidgeted nervously.

      'This isn't some elaborate ruse to get your boyfriend to move into the dorm with you is it?' Saito asked, a slight accusation in his voice

      Anna and Chii's faces both went dark with anger, and Chii opened their mouth to say something. Anna gave her hot headed friend a warning look before she answered herself

      'I guarantee you Nitori Shuuichi is not my boyfriend'

      Saito seemed to think about it for a few more minutes, typing on his computer and reading whatever had come up.

      ‘Very well.’ Saito said, ‘University protocol states there must be a year of transition before anything like this is allowed but as you both know Mr Nitori and are ok with him moving in then we can wave that requirement.’

      Anna and Chii both stared daggers at the administrators seemingly deliberate misgendering of Nitori but said nothing.

      ‘I will lodge the transfer forms, but he will need a psychological evaluation before he is allowed to move dorms,’ Saito continued, seeming oblivious to the hostile stares, ‘now is there anything else?’

      Anna shook her head and the two of them stood and left the office.

      Chii waited until they were out of earshot of the office before breaking down laughing, shooting Anna an amused look

      'What?' Anna asked but Chii just continued giving Anna the amused look

      'What I told him was 100% the truth, she isn't my boyfriend at all,' Anna said and shrugged, 'it's not my fault that he's a bigot’

******************************************************************************

      Nitori pushed open the door to the bakery and cafe, the bell on the door jingling. At the sound of the bell several voices chorused a welcome to the store. Ariga turned to the door to see who had entered and then turned back to the back of the shop.

      ‘Mum, Nitorin is here!’ Ariga called out, ‘I’m going to go on break’

      ‘Alright darling.’ Ariga’s mum called back.

      Ariga turned back to Nitori and grinned, gesturing her to a table in the corner. Nitori grinned back at Ariga. Her hair was longer now, almost to her shoulder and she wore a green long sleeve winter dress with grey leggings. The most noticeable change, however, was how Ariga carried herself. Where before she was awkward, nervous and uncertain, she now held herself with confidence and surety and she looked so much happier. Nitori felt a slight twinge of jealousy.

      ‘You look amazing,’ Nitori exclaimed.

      ‘Thank you,’ Ariga said flushing slightly at the compliment

      ‘what was all that fuss last year about you not making as cute of a girl as me, because it’s not true’

      Ariga smiled broadly ‘God mum was so angry at you,’ she said and laughed ‘I had just come out to her and her reaction was get angry at the person making me feel bad.’  
The two of them smiled and laughed at the memory.

      ‘See and I told you that you had nothing to worry about,’ the voice of Ariga’s mum cut in from beside them, surprising them. Nitori and Ariga too focused on each other to notice her approach.

      ‘It’s so nice to see you again Nitori,’ Ariga’s mum said with a smile and then pulled her note pad out from the front of her apron, ‘Now, ladies, what can I get you two?’

      The two of them ordered their respective drinks and Ariga’s mum left to make them. The two of them made small talk while waiting for their drinks. It didn’t take long before they had been place on the table.

      ‘How as university been treating you?’ Nitori asked

      ‘Good all things considered,’ Ariga replied, ‘classes have been going well and I haven’t run into too many problems with teachers and my transition.’ Ariga made a face, ‘I’ve had one or two bad students but they’re mostly just harmless idiots’

      ‘That’s good to hear’

      ‘Also that reminds me.’ Ariga said and reached into the pocket and pulls out two cards, ‘This is the details of the clinic that I go to and the psychologist that I saw for my assessment.’

      ‘Thanks Ariga.’

      ‘Hikari!’ Ariga’s mum called from the kitchen, ‘We need you off break.’

      ‘Coming mum!’ Ariga called back and then turned back to Nitori, ‘Sorry got to go.’

      Nitori raised an eyebrow at Ariga before she could run off. Ariga flushed a little, embarrassed as she realised.

      ‘Right, I forgot to mention,’ Ariga said as she pulled her apron back on, ‘I have a new name’

      ‘It’s a lovely name,’ Nitori said, ‘I guess I’ll see you next time I’m in town.’

      ‘Drop by anytime.’ Ariga replied smiling, ‘it was nice seeing you, and next time we should catch up when I have more time.’ Ariga turned and walked hurriedly back to the kitchen.

      Nitori made her way to the counter to pay, and as the staff member rang up her drink Ariga’s mother appeared from behind the counter.

      ‘Today’s drink is on the house,’ she said, ‘it’s not every day that Hikari’s best friend comes to visit and I feel bad that you two couldn’t chat for longer.’

      Nitori bowed and thanked her and then turned to leave the cafe. As she made her way from the cafe to the train station she pulled one of the cards from her pocket and dialled the number written on it. The phone rang for a few seconds before a woman’s voice answered.

      ‘Yes hello,’ Nitori said, ‘Is this Dr. Funai’s office?’


	3. Stargazing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gah sorry for how long this chapter took, University kinda stole all my time. But I'm on to my honours now and it's mostly research and I've been trying to do a bit of writing in the evenings so, no promises but I might be able to update more regularity this year. I have plans to at least.
> 
> Anyway, shorter chapter this time because it seemed like the natural conclusion of the chapter and adding any more would just draw it out.

Ana sat on top of a hill under the night sky, Nitori’s head in her lap. The evening was cool and there wasn’t a single cloud in the sky and so Ana had dragged Nitori out of her stuffy dorm to go stargazing. Not that Nitori had really made much in the way of protest in being dragged away from a boring assignment to spend the evening with her girlfriend.

            After a while of staring at the sky Ana turned her gaze downwards, to watch her girlfriend’s face, the night sky gently reflected in Nitori’s eyes. Her gaze was miles away, seemingly staring past the stars, lost deep in thought. From the way her eyebrows were slightly furrowed and her slightly crooked mouth they were probably not the greatest thoughts.

            After a moments consideration Ana reached down and stroked Nitori’s head, running her hands gently through Nitori’s hair. She’d been letting her hair grow out in the month’s leading up to her decision to start transitioning and now it was past her jaw. Nitori started slightly at the touch, jolted from her thoughts, before turning her eyes to look up at Ana

            ‘Worrying about something?’ Ana asked and Nitori’s brow furrowed further.

            ‘Lots of things actually,’ Nitori smiled slightly, ‘Now that I have an appointment there’s a handful of things on the horizon.’

            ‘Oh yeah?’ Ana asked, ‘Like what?’

            ‘Telling my parents for one.’ Nitori said and grimaced, ‘I mean, they largely accept this all but I don’t know how they’ll react to me actually transitioning you know?’

            Nitori sighed heavily. ‘And then there’s my appointment with Dr. Funai, and what if it doesn’t go as planned, what if I’m-‘ Nitori cut herself off before finishing the thought realising she was starting to ramble.

            Nitori shifted around before easing herself up, taking a sitting position next to Ana, staring at the stars again, pausing for a brief moment, breathing, before continuing.

            ‘I keep playing all these scenarios out in my head over and over and they never work out.’

            ‘Or it could all go completely smoothly too,’ Ana said, ‘Your parent’s could be accepting and loving like Ariga’s. Your appointment with Dr. Funai could go wonderfully and you transition smoothly and without a hitch’

            Nitori opened her mouth to protest but Ana cut her off.

            ‘All of this stuff is in the future anyway. You don’t have to tell your parents for a while, you live in a completely different city now and I don’t doubt things will be too obvious when you go back in a month or two for the winter break. Plus Dr Funai is still almost a month away.’

            Nitori let out a deep breath and turned her gaze back to Ana.

            ‘I suppose you’re right,’ Nitori said.

            ‘Of course I am,’ Ana said, smiling playfully, ‘I am girlfriend and your girlfriend is always right’

            ‘How does that work then,’ Nitori said, a smile pulling at her lips, ‘if we’re gay and both each other’s girlfriends?

            ‘Well if we’re both subjectively right then we’ll have to go on a case by case basis won’t we’ Ana said, her grin audible in her voice.

            The two of them laughed, and Ana smiled even wider. Nitori rarely laughed of late and Ana had made her laugh. She had such a nice laugh too.

            After the laughter subsided Ana leaned in to Nitori, resting her head on her shoulder. Nitori relaxed into Ana, putting her arm around her. The two girls held each other close, listening to the other breath, enjoying the moment together as the world moved around them.

            Finally, after a while the two girls stirred, both taking deep breaths as the rest of the world filtered back into their perceptions.

            ‘We should really get back to our dorms’ Anna said stretching and beginning to move off down the hill, Nitori following close behind her.

            ‘Hey Anna?’ Nitori asked when she caught up to Anna.

            ‘Yes?’ Anna responded, half turning her head so she could look at Nitori while she also kept and eye on where she was going.

            ‘Will you come with me to my appointment with doctor Funai?’ Nitori asked.

            ‘Of course! We can make a trip of it.’ Anna smiled, ‘We can stay with my parents this time, I’m sure they’d love to see me for a night’

            ‘Oh perfect,’ Nitori said, ‘I was wondering about where I was going to stay, still don’t want to stay with my parents but I’m not sure Kanako would have me over again’

            ‘You’re going to have to tell them eventually Nitori.’ Ana said and Nitori sighed

            ‘I know I do, but just not while I’m dealing with doctors and psychologists.’

            The two of them reached the bottom of the hill and they said their final goodbyes before walking towards their respective dorm buildings.


End file.
